The class would drag on for
would try my best to read while other times i
would lay my head on the hard table,and
like a baby. Stephanie would rouse me when
was time to go. Sleepily,i would walk her
to the staff quarters,then begin the long
journey to my house. We kept to this routine
almost judiciously Occasionally she would
me to stay over. Waking up very early the
morning,i would hurry off to my
the early risers along the way,and the astute
shop owners,who came very early to clean
their shops,in preparation for the day ahead.
With the exams on and the end of semester
sight,a sudden spate of sadness fell on me. I
knew our days were numbered. Soon our
together would just be memories,sweet
memories to be reminisced and longed for.
Damn those were difficult days,i thought i
prepared,having come to terms with the fact
about a month earlier,but i was in for a
Nobody can prepare for seperation,no matter
how strong you are,it overwhelms you,you
irritated with people easily,you go to sleep
a forlorn expression. And then you see them
your dreams. I wasnt safe even in my
dreams,she was always in it.
One day i woke up crying,and i couldnt even
remember what i had dreamt about. I sat in
bed for about an hour,my head heavy in my
She tried so hard to console me,to wean me
her gracefully,but i made it difficult for her.
Then came the first rains,it was early
holidays were upon us. I still remember the
sweet scent of rain,washing up the horrid
of dust,which had collected throughout the
season. It was always so relaxing,especially
when we would be holed up in bed,talking
about what we were gonna miss about each
other,and our best times together.
The first time i saw his face,the guy stealing
happiness. I held the picture in my
hands,staring deeply into it. I was in her
room,she had gone out to do something,so i
decided to go through one of her bags. The
minute i saw it,i knew it was him. She never
talked about him,but i yearned to know what
he looked like. He looked horrible,at least to
What i saw was a man with a bashed in
face,bony cheeks that gave him gawky
features,a crooked nose,and a mouth too big
his small face. Although later when i thought
about it,he really didnt look that bad,he
probably was handsome,i just couldnt see
it,even if i did,my doleful mind could not
process it. I saw what i wanted to see,i can
forgiven for that!.
Our last night together was spent making
love,passionate sweet love. It wasnt anything
like before,our souls melted as one,each
a true reflection of the melancholy that had
permeated our ambience.She was good at
hiding her emotions,always hidden in that
smiling façade. But that night was different.
She didnt cry,but i saw the hurt on her
face,and it neutered my own pain. I was sure
she wouldnt forget me. We were never meant
to end up together,the odds were against
us,and the gods made sure of that,or else i
would have been born earlier,or she later. I
consoled by the fact that i had a memory,i
a story,and that someday i would tell it with
bold face. I have seen love firsthand,and it
couldnt have come any better. Different
have different stories about their first
first love,some even forget,but not me,it was
too special to forget,it changed me.
The day before our last night,we joked
made half hearted attempts at comforting
deeper desires,and our unwillingness to part.
She told me how i was the best man she
met,and how our times together were forever
indelible in her heart. I found solace in that.
Then she went on to tell how we would be
or married to different people and find our
minds wandering off to what could have
we had ended up together. I laughed at
that,although i doubt if my laughter did
to mask my anguish. I replied,telling her how
the great love stories had one thing in
common,they hardly grew old together. She
laughed so hard and told me i had a twisted
mind,and how on earth did i think about
We continued with our witty exchanges,till we
had nothing more to say.We sat there in
quietness,lost in silent soliloquy. Moments
heard the gayful chatter of birds,as they
perched and flew about in the compound.
They had come to a sad place,i thought.
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